Feeling Stuck? Change Your Focus
“Outstanding people have one thing in common: an absolute sense of mission.”
- Zig Ziglar, motivational speaker
I noticed that when I am attempting something new, especially in my coaching business, I often hesitate. I’m the type of person who wants to know exactly what’s in store for me - the outcome of my efforts before I take the plunge. Of course, I know that’s not possible and yet, I hesitate. At times, my hesitation ends up being a block to me and I am stuck with all these thoughts of uncertainties in my head. I don’t move forward.
Have you experienced this before? We work, we struggle, we try to do everything we possibly can to move forward in our plans but it seems like the harder we work, the more stuck we get.
What can you do to get unstuck?
What has worked for me is to switch my focus from the person in the mirror to the person I want to connect/encourage or impact. I realised when I am working on something new or doing a difficult task in my business, if I keep my focus on what I want out of it, I seemed to find more faults. I am critical. I am easily discouraged. However, when I think about how my work will benefit my clients, I feel energised and excited to see it through, despite the uncertainties.
I am not disputing the fact that it is important to take care of our interests. We need to set goals, lay out plans and then do those things we need to do so that we can make some progress toward our goals. For example, we need to demonstrate personal financial responsibility and plan for our children’s education and our retirement as well as cater for those rainy days.
However, what frequently happens is that we become so over-focused on ourselves and our own personal well-being that we wind up building huge walls to protect ourselves and our interests. We lose the ability – or even desire – to see the bigger picture and the possibilities that life presents to us. We become so focused on “me” that we sometimes begin scrutinizing even the most insignificant events to determine their potential impact on our personal lives. We become victims to ourselves. We often become so busy being busy that we lose track of where we thought we wanted our lives to wind up in the first place.
One possible solution as I mentioned earlier is to change our focus from “me” to “others”. From being the receiver to being the giver. And no, I’m not implying that this shift in perspective requires major changes in the things we do every day. It may eventually lead to that but it’s not a critical part of the initial process.
No matter what you do to earn a living or keep the household moving in a logical direction, somewhere down the line, a person will benefit from what you do. Think about it. The work we do is not just to stuff computer systems full of information or help machines work better. It’s not just to bring home our salary at the end of the month. It’s not just filling out forms, nailing pieces of boards together, assembling electronic devices, hauling packages, going to meetings and the list goes on. Somewhere, sometime, perhaps sooner than you realise, another human being will likely be positively affected by what you do.
Take a few minutes to really think about the people – the individuals who will be better off, healthier or happier because of what you do. Think about how you are giving of your time and talents so that others will benefit in some way from your efforts.
When we change our focus from “me” to “others”, our work – the things we do every day – starts taking on a new significance. We are now a giver. Our life starts becoming more meaningful. We start to realise that what we do is important to someone else, that we are making a difference for that person.
“If you think you're too small to have an impact, try going to bed with a mosquito.”
- Anita Roddick, founder of The Body Shop
Are you up to give this experiment a go? The next time you’re stuck or feeling a block in a particular task, plan or goal, instead of focusing on what you want to get out of it, think about how it will create a positive impact for a particular person. See if that ignites your creative and problem-solving sparks!
If this little experiment does not bear any positive results for you and you are still feeling stuck, please reach out to me by contacting me here to explore how I can support you.
