Smell the Oranges
“If you don’t stop to smell the roses every once in a while, you will eventually become a thorn in your own side.”
Stop and smell the roses, or in my recent experience, smell the oranges! My youngest daughter took pains to carefully peel 2 mandarin oranges and lovingly arranged them on a plate as seen in the photo. She brought them to me during a busy work afternoon to share the oranges with me. She knew I was working hard and thought I needed a break. When I saw the slices of mandarin oranges beautifully arranged by my daughter, my heart melted and I immediately stopped looking at the document in my laptop. We then had a nice 20 minutes just eating the oranges and talking about how our respective mornings went. It was a beautiful moment of connection and bonding between me and my daughter. It happened because she noticed that I needed a “pick-me-up” and acted on it by following her heart. It happened because I made a conscious decision to stop what I was doing and slowed down to focus all my attention on her. She even asked me if I was going to use the photo for one of my blog posts and my answer was a definite “yes”!
So, here we are…
How busy is your life today? What is your immediate response if there is an interruption in the middle of your busy day? Do you welcome it if it comes from someone you love and hold close to your heart? Are you easily irritated or annoyed by that interruption? Do you have a long to-do list which seems to grow by the day? Do you feel like a hamster running on a wheel, unable to step off it for the fear that everything will fall apart if you do?
A friend shared the other day that when she is not feeling good in herself i.e., not at peace within herself, the smallest challenges or issues can blow up into unmanageable problems. However, when she is feeling that she is in a good place, mentally, emotionally and physically, these same challenges are actually very manageable. She is able to see the solutions and take the necessary steps towards them. If she is not in a good place, she feels trapped in her head and can’t really see any breakthrough in her circumstances.
We then talked about self-care. She has been feeling stressed and stretched lately with responsibilities and commitments at home and at work. She candidly said that she couldn’t recall the last time she spent any time doing something she enjoyed by herself.
What is self-care?
I came across this article published in PsychCentral titled “What Self-Care is — and What It Isn’t” written by Raphailia Michael and medically reviewed by the Scientific Advisory Board, where she defined self-care as “any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health”. It’s also important to know what self-care is not. It is not a selfish act. It is not something forced although we have to make it a point to do it e.g., like scheduling self-care time in our busy schedules and committing to keep our self-care “appointments”. Not to move them around if we have other more pressing things to tend to. If we don’t look after ourselves, who will?
“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.”
Photo by Heidi Kaden on Unsplash
Have you done anything recently that rejuvenates you? Have you actively sought to recharge your batteries? Do you have something that you look forward to on a daily basis? How do you feel after you have tended to yourself? Are there lingering feelings of guilt? Do you feel that self-care is a luxury and that there has been too much hype around it?
The benefits of self-care can be divided into 3 categories:
Physical - by committing to look after your body and tending to its needs, you will become healthier. This would include regular exercise, sufficient sleep and listening to your body especially when you feel tension or pain.
Mental - by recognising that you have negative thoughts but choosing not to let those thoughts overwhelm you. Have a healthy outlook in life and look for opportunities for self-improvement and personal growth. Invest in your mental development, both personally and professionally.
Emotional - by committing to accept that emotions do not form who you are. They are just emotions, feelings and again, you have a choice not to succumb to the emotions. Make time for relaxing activities to soothe the mind and body.
For me, simple things like a cup of coffee when the house is quiet in the morning starts my day on a calm, peaceful note. Writing provides me with an outlet to process my thoughts and emotions and it also gives me great joy. I enjoy exercising with my children and we have a lot of fun while we’re at it. I write in my journal every night before bedtime. Over the weekends, I watch comedies or movies with my husband. Yes, these are small simple things and yet, I know that something is not quite right when I don’t do them.
Have you considered how you’re doing with your own self-care routine? Drop me a note here if you want to take a self-care quiz to find out the current level of your self-care. If you would like to explore how coaching can help you achieve a better balance in your life, book a free 30-minutes call with me to find out more.
“I have come to believe that caring for myself is not self indulgent. Caring for myself is an act of survival.”
